Conversations are universal. Billions of people likely engage in trillions of conversations annually. 

Is there an art to conversations, though?

While it is easy to connect with conversations about updates from work, the stock market, politics, sports or latest advances in science and technology, these conversations may not cater to all the audiences. We could all use a learning into conversations that are more generic, connect deeper and foster a lively conversation with all the members of the party or the group. 

A deeper dive into some learnings for a fun engaging conversations revealed the following – be a good listener, read the body language of the other party, open ended questions, ask connecting questions and maybe a closing statement before pivoting the conversation to the next topic (awkward pause helps too haha). Keep it light, comfortable and memorable. 

Below are some of the general topics and connecting questions to discuss that may be engaging to all members of the group (without being cringeworthy) –

• Everyone watches TV, movies and OTT – what did you watch recently?, What are you guys watching right now?, what was your most memorable series / movie from last year / or the best series ever?, favorite genre and its most famous directors, and/or feature films. 

• Everyone cooks – do you enjoy cooking or shows about competitive cooking?, what is your favorite meal/cuisine to cook?, have you tried meal delivery services? How did you like them? 

• Everyone has skills/hobbies outside of their work – what do you enjoy doing outside of work?, how did you pick that up? Which avenues do you tap into to expand these hobbies nearby?

• Everyone faced the pandemic – how did you spend time when the first lockdown happened?, was it difficult to adjust to the sudden change in pace in life? Hoping yourselves and your family members escaped unscathed from the pandemic, What do you miss from the old times?

• Everyone has moved from some place to the current place – what did you miss about the previous place?, What do you miss about being in the city? Will you be getting your own place soon? (so much to talk about this)

• Everyone travels and wishes to travel – what is the favorite place that you travelled to?, where would you want to visit?, what is your favorite place to visit around here? 

• Everyone met the other person – How did you guys meet?, what was he/she like while growing up?, what is the favorite memory that you share together?,   

• Everyone grew up – how was your childhood like?, Where did you spend your childhood?, What did you study in undergraduate school? what did you enjoy the most growing up?, how do you think the world has changed since you grew up? What kind of shows did you watch growing up?

• Everyone has brothers, sisters or cousins – do you have brothers or sisters?, what do they do?, hoping you get a chance to meet them often and spend time with them?

• Country and culture – Tell me about your country, what defined its history? Which defining event do you remember while growing up?

• Some other ones (special situations) – Kids, alternate businesses, and more 

Closing statements of a conversation loop –  That was sweet, that was very thoughtful, my wife/partner and I would love to do that too, I hope things get better, okay, let’s talk about something else. A closing statement could also be just pause and some moments of awkward silence and that’s a cue to pivot to the next topic. 😉

Some powerful words of engagement – “How about you?”, “I love that show”, “you got to tell me more about that?” , “Oh wow, did you like that?”, “oh, that is amazing/so cool”, “oh wow, that is incredible”, “oh, tell me about it”, “oh damn, I hope not”.

Insightful tips from a conversation savant: Do not ask a yes/no or one word [answer] question. Enjoy a lovely conversation by asking smart open ended connecting questions that explore the reply to your initial question. Don’t overdo it though. 

In an era where we are more divided and distant than ever before, good engaging conversations could be the perfect segue for a world where we share and find more things common with each other and than not. 

I am going to use some of these tips in all my future meetings and hope you do it too 🙂